Like an obsessed man-child crushing his pet mouse with frenzied affection, foodies' unslakable thirst for ramps is apparently wiping out the supply. In an interview with Boston Eater, wild foods advocate (yes, that's a thing) Russ Cohen says that the craze has resulted in ramps being "completely removed from the landscape…I'm observing a bit of a Gold Rush mentality, where people are just converting these plants to cash and looking at them like dollar signs." Or pesto. Or a pizza topping.

If you don't know what a "ramp" is, stay indoors and do not leave your apartment until June, lest the collective cackle of a sect of eaters shatter your eardrums. Cohen suggests that ramps can be harvested responsibly by merely leaving the bulb in the ground:

Just pick one leaf per plant and leave the bulb in the ground and then you have a golden goose basically, a plant that keeps producing for you. I'm not telling people they shouldn't pick ramps, because ramps are wonderful and it's fun. And if you stick to this method, you won't hurt the plants and you won't hurt the sensitive habitat in which these plants like to grow.
And I've actually found that this way is faster, easier on the back and the knees, and also cleaner. You're not getting a speck of dirt on anything. If you gather the leaves this way and bring them home and just throw them in a plastic bag with a damp paper towel and seal up the bag in the little vegetable drawer in your fridge, they'll last several weeks minimum without any deterioration at all. They don't need to have the bulb on there to have the shelf life.

For those who just go to the greenmarket for our ramps, Cohen encourages us "to say you don't have to dig up a ramp to enjoy the flavor, and try to shift the consciousness about this plant to this more sustainable way of interacting with it."