pooping

"How do you explain this to your imaginary girlfriend?"

"You're exactly like the real Spider-Man, except when your senses are tingling, it's bedbugs."

If you've ever wanted to see a dog puppet passionately hump a terrified lizard while making small talk, this is the video for you.

"I have noticed that tonight's game represents the largest penis size differential in the history of World Cup sports. Arigato, arigato, arigato."

Triumph went to various bars around Astoria to soak in the "flashmob of horrible BO" and hilariously poop on World Cup fans.

Have you ever taken a close look at the statue in McGolrick Park in Greenpoint? Because there's something strange about it...