Meet Patrick Quinn, a Brooklyn man sent straight from Central Casting to the pages of the Daily News, where he appears to fulfill nearly every cliched notion of what makes a hipster. Quinn is a blacksmith who makes hand-crafted belt buckles that can hold your MetroCard—they cost $125 each and they're sold on Etsy. It's as if the News sent out a Hipster Stereotype Survey to Brooklyn residents and Quinn came back with all the right answers. But reached by phone today, Quinn shockingly revealed that his hipster credentials are less than sterling!

The News profile puts Quinn somewhere on the hipster relativity spectrum between Kyp Malone and the unicorn beekeeper—he has mutton chops, comes here from Vermont, skateboards, and lives in Bushwick—but a little digging finds that Quinn may not be the uber-hipster he appears. While he does have tattoos (four of blacksmith equipment), he does NOT commute by bicycle. Nor is he vegan; in fact, Quinn tells us the meat he consumes is not always locally sourced. It gets worse: When asked his opinion of Radiohead's new album, Quinn told us, "I have some of their albums, but I don't really jam to them that much. I listen to Phish." But you wouldn't know that from reading the Daily News!

After revealing his Phish predilection, Quinn asked, "Are you going to print that I listen to Phish? Fine, I don't care. I didn't listen to them for a long time, but I'm ready to own it." Like a true hipster, Quinn tells us he doesn't want to be perceived as a hipster, so perhaps the Phish confession will help counterbalance the News profile. On the other hand, it could be that Quinn is actually an early-adopter of the backlash against the Phish backlash, would put him back in the running for the ultimate hipster ~~crown~~ cycling hat. These are the things that keep us up at night. Developing...

Oh right, about the belt buckle MetroCard holders! They are felt lined, and Quinn makes them at Total Metal Resource in, where else, Greenpoint. He tells us he's sold about 30 of the felt-lined buckles so far, and only to men, because "not a lot of women have been receptive to such a big belt buckle." But don't worry ladies and fancy-boys—he's hard at work on a prototype that will clip onto a shoulder strap.