Earlier this month, Dunkin' Donuts rolled out a line of so-called "artisan bagels," claiming it had "reinvented its bagel recipe, delivering a new line of bagels that features a soft and chewy texture with bolder flavors." Now a Queens-based bagel company is taking legal action in an attempt to force Dunkin' to drop the word "artisan" from its marketing strategy, arguing that it's false advertising.

Marc Fintz, the Director of Business Development for Davidovich Bakery, tells us, "We make bagels in the Old World tradition by hand: kettle-boiled, plank baked, using traditional recipes. Companies like Dunkin—you won't even see a human making bagels in their factory. It's all machines, all robots." And it's only a matter of time before the robots become self-aware and start demanding their bagels "scooped out."

Davidovich has filed motions with the Federal Trade Commission and New York State Attorney General, as well as the Better Business Bureau national advertising board. The company alleges that Dunkin' Donuts artisan bagels "creates the perception that their products are produced by hand, using traditional methods in small quantities. This is not the case." But come on, what about the bald guy who wakes up at dawn to make the donuts in the TV commercials? Is he a robot too?

"Dunkin' Donuts is the antithesis of an artisan baker," Fintz insists. "This isn't even subjective. They could say they have 'the best' bagel, but they're not artisan bagels. It's no different from saying you're kosher when you're not, or you're organic when you're not." Or 80 calories when you're really a whopping 340!