Maybe that gay Anthony Weiner sploof wasn't so ill-timed? Because just when you thought it was safe to ignore Anthony Weiner again—BAM!—one of his old sexting mistresses has decided to write a book, evocatively titled I Freinded [sic] You. Beyond offering Georgia teacher Traci Nobles a chance to let out her side of the story while simultaneously embarrassing Weiner and his wife Huma Abedin (not to mention her family) the book gives us all a chance to settle in with some good old fashioned sext poetry. For instance! "Omg. I didn't think I could get any harder. That is a perfect pussy. I'm not used to such a perfect pussy. Baby you're beautiful."
So, what new details of Weinergate are brought forth in today's excepts? Well Weiner was very proud of his Johnson ("It's a big office and you know that's not the only thing here that's big"), may have once masturbated in Congressional bathrooms ("'I had to do some wiping in the bathroom hehe,' he wrote minutes later."), may have some longstanding issues with his in-laws ("They just believe I should be Muslim or convert… it makes for a lot of uncomfortable meetings" and "they are a bit backwards thinking"), didn't like his former rival and now replacement Bob Turner ("Just another rich businessman trying to buy himself an election… like Bloomberg.") and sometimes sexted while using an avatar with a photograph of his niece's face—presumably to keep his identity hidden.
Meanwhile, in case you were wondering, Ms. Nobles didn't write this book to make a quick buck. No sir!
For me personally, it is important to address how I was portrayed, as well as how my involvement has affected various aspects of my life, as well as those who are close to me," she told the Mail. "The memoir is not specifically about Weiner or his family, it is me explaining my involvement, what has transpired since it all began, and the truth that has yet to be told. It is not about being bitter, it is however to emphasise that only one side of the story has been told, only partially, and in a very controlled way for that matter.
Sigh. In the end, the only thing this latest development does is make us feel even worse for Huma. And for her and Weiner's unborn child.