I don't know about you but, now that it is January and not November, I am ready for the blizzard. It is time. I have stockpiled all these dry goods, all these non-perishables, and while their expiration date is still some time off, the expiration date on my patience fast approaches. It is peak snow season! I am ready to watch my cat attack the windows as the flakes fall! I have resigned myself to filthy unmelting slush mountains for the foreseeable future! Where is our cozy snow quilt?? Where in the heck is it??

Well, possibly it is en route. According to AccuWeather, gnarly snowstorms may "deliver [a] one-two punch to the Midwest and Northeast this week." The Northeast, that's us! How exciting. How frankly overdue.

Please note that the storm threatening to pummel us on Saturday does not seem to be the one that battled its way from the Rocky Mountains to the Mid-Atlantic this past weekend, the one that dumped more than a foot of snow in certain spots, and left seven people dead. Washington, D.C. residents reportedly watched it snow for a disconcerting 1.5 days, an onslaught AccuWeather warned us to read as "a sign of a more volatile weather pattern shaping up for the central and eastern U.S."

AccuWeather meteorologist Dave Dombek told Gothamist that a new storm is gathering strength over the Pacific, slated to make moves on California by Thursday. From there, it could track south through Texas and across the Tennessee Valley, hooking east or northeast. By Saturday, NYC could be looking at what Dombek previously classified as a "pretty significant, juicy storm," one that brings not just SNOW but also ICE and RAIN. Yes, that's right, all your faves are represented in this wintry "mixed bag of precipitation," and may even bombard us for like 24 hours.

A spokesperson for the Office of Emergency Management said, "We’ve been in close daily contact with the National Weather Service to monitor this weekend’s storm. While there is still uncertainty about the potential impact the storm could have here in the city, NYC Emergency Management will continue to work with the National Weather Service to closely monitor the weather, and with city agencies to coordinate preparations ahead of the storm."

Acknowledging that "it's still early in the game," that "things are fluid and subject to change," Dombek said that right now, it looks as though a fairly dry Saturday will morph seamlessly into snow—how much, Dombek couldn't say, but at some point during the night, he predicts the atmosphere will warm enough to turn the snow to rain, maybe ice. Temperatures could climb into the 40s on Sunday, but then "drop like a rock." The air will be absolutely frigid, friends. Think "barely above ten, maybe not even above ten," Dombek says. "It'll feel like it's below zero." And it will feel that way through Monday.

The situation currently looks poised to go one of two ways, both of them bad. In Scenario A, Dombek explained, we get more snow on Sunday night, turning our metropolis into a sprawling sort of snow-ice-snow baked Alaska. In Scenario B, Saturday's rain washes away whatever accumulation you'd hoped to use for your snowman, leaving behind the dreaded curbside slush lagoons. Either way, he explained, "Everything is just going to be a frozen mess here, Sunday night and Monday."

Wintry mix is arguably the single most beguiling enemy the Sanitation Department knows, and they have been bested by The Weather in uncomfortably recent memory. In November, six inches of snowfall sent the entire city skidding off the rails, despite ostensible over-preparedness on the part of Sanitation and the Office of Emergency Management. It's never too early to ENGAGE FULL SNOW RESPONSE HELL YES.