Marriage is hard, and divorce is usually worse: sometimes your ex sends you poo-covered alimony checks, and sometimes your ex scratches your testicles so hard you bleed. That's what ABC weatherman Bill Evans claims his soon-to-be ex-wife did to him. We imagine it was raining pure pain that day.

52-year-old Emmy-winning meteorologist Evans and his wife Dana are in the middle of an apparently contentious divorce, according to Greenwich Times. Each alleges that the other physically assaulted them during a confrontation on May 4th that revolved around moving cars at their Old Greenwich home in Connecticut.

Evans claims the confrontation started when his wife “began to insult him in front of their children and told him that he does not live there nor is he wanted there,” according to the affidavit. They got into an argument over moving a car, and Evans claims she punched and slapped him before throwing the keys into a closet. While fighting for the keys, she allegedly "grabbed the waist band of his underwear and reached for his scrotum with her free hand, subsequently scratching it, which resulted in bleeding.” Then she allegedly repeatedly hit him with a wooden hanger.

Dana admitted to hitting him with the hanger, but said it was because he initiated the fight by grabbing her wrist, shoving her, and punching her in the face. Evans' lawyer claims she only went forward with this story to gain an upper hand in the divorce proceedings, which Dana's lawyer strenuously denies.

Both parties have been arraigned on charges of disorderly conduct and third-degree assault, and ordered to stay the hell away from each other.