When will the prissy pedal-pushers understand the unadulterated joy that comes from filling a machine full of expensive liquid dinosaurs and flooring it down bucolic winding roads and through glass and steel canyons deep into the bosom of Freedom? Never, and not just because this reality exists only in car commercials, but because no high octane-blooded vehicle would ever be caught consorting with two-wheeled—wait, bikes? In a Formula One commercial? And why are they circling the…ewwwwwwwwwww!

We're not quite sure what these cyclists are doing, riding around Red Bull's impressive Formula One race car as it suggestively does donuts (oh come on just look at it!), but we're pretty sure they all shared a cigarette afterwards. Perhaps it's a peace offering to everyone who'd rather not be flattened by a car going 190 mph while walking their dog, or battered by a flying tire as they sit on a park bench. Share The Road, But Wear A Condom?

The weirdness, which is designed to promote the Formula One Grand Prix of America coming to Weehawken and Union City in June of next year, begins at the 2:20 mark. It's NSFW if you work in a garage. But you'd be remiss to skip past the beginning of the video, in which the national anthem is played by revving car engines.

[Streetsblog]