Amy Borkowsky, a former advertising executive-turned comedian, has found a way to cash in memorialize her humorously overprotective mother, who died in 2003 after a lifetime devoted to her daughter's safety and well-being. For almost a decade, Borkowsky has been selling CD compilations of her mom's answering machine messages, which include such sage advice as: "You know the red terry robe you wore when I came to visit? It's like a ruby red with a belt? If you take out the garbage, you may want to put on something else, because my friend Eileen's grandson said that red is a gang color." Now iPhone users can have such universal life-lessons at their fingertips! Listen:

Other Amy's Mom messages include hot tips on avoiding gum disease: "If you're going to plan on kissing any new guys, just casually ask them if they have gingivitis." The "Amy's Mom" app comes with ten safety tips and is available on iTunes for $1.99, with an additional eight messages available for just 99 cents. Borkowsky tells the Daily News, "Even though she's not with me, I still hear her voice...I think my mother would tell me, 'Don't post your whereabouts on Facebook, or somebody will come and ransack your apartment.' " It's good advice, but does Amy ever listen?