Traffic ground to a halt on the Brooklyn Bridge yesterday around 11:30 a.m. when an elderly couple got into a violent altercation with a much younger livery cab driver. One motorist captured video of the fight, which escalated quickly after the two parties clashed during a lane merge and the cab driver allegedly threw a can of Pringles at the couple's minivan.

"Pringles were flying everywhere,” Marc Freund, a lawyer who was driving a few cars behind, tells the NY Post. “Then they threw water at him, and then all hell ensued." Indeed, as another witness puts it, the elderly man got out of the minivan and was soon "throwing punches like Floyd Mayweather Jr. He’s just pummeling the guy.”

It also appears that the elderly woman in the minivan inflamed the situation when she advanced upon the livery driver with her cane. "She looked like she was trying to attack the car," Freund, who took the video, tells the Daily News. "He disabled her, then slammed her and tackled her."

The livery cab driver was reportedly "scraped up," but by the time the NYPD arrived, everyone involved in the brawl had gone their separate ways. And they would have merged quietly back into irritable anonymity, were it not for Freund, who documented the whole scene and, if he's smart, will quickly solicit venture capital for OldsterWorldstar.com.

“I don’t know why everyone was so agitated so early,” Freund reflected later. “It was 11:30 in the morning.” Come on Freund, this is New York City. We're pretty much all agitated from the moment we wake up at dawn because that one annoying bird starts braying in the courtyard. What kind of bird is that? Is it illegal to shoot annoying birds in the city limits?