Best New Year's Eve crime story ever, by Cab Drivers Tell Me I'm Pretty-- bonus points for writing it in blank verse:
Last night my little sister was mugged. Luckily, she is okay. Luckily, it was only 7:30 p.m. when it happened. Luckily, she got all her stuff back. Luckily, she was mere feet from her apartment, and also near a taekwondo academy, at the time. Luckily, some guys on their way into the Upright Citizens Brigade Theater drop-kicked and held down the perpetrator as he tried to get away.
If you are one of these super-ninja-samaritans, or you know these super-ninja-samaritans, please contact us. She'd like, very much, to say "thank you."
Wow-- who knew comedy-fans were so tough? And what's a drop-kick? Is that like a regular-kick, but lower?