111408abc.jpgWith New York's obscene real estate market starting to look ever so slightly less obscene, real estate brokers are panicking like jocks on prom night stuck with dates who won't neck. The crack trend spotters at the Times report that brokers are plying their clients with hard liquor and expensive wine so as to wear down their resistance. "Alcohol brings everyone together," declared broker Kipton Davis while showing a group of bankers and traders around a $9.9 million penthouse—as they knocked back Chardonnay, Chinon, and Lagavulin ($77/bottle) whiskey. But no matter how much these brokers promise to respect their clients in the morning, prudes like 28-year-old banker Jeff Nelson are still throwing up the Heisman. Sure, he's happy to take the free drinks, but let's face it: "The way prices are going, there’s no way to know where these prices will be next year." That's right, Nelson; a wealthy young catch like yourself ought to make 'em beg for it.