You might remember Roy Den Hollander from his much publicized War on Ladies Night, having argued on the Colbert Report, eyes heavy with emotion, that women are given preferential treatment at nightclubs. "If they want equality, let's give them 51 percent of the worst of this society. Then they'll change their tune and they'll start whining 'Where's the kitchen,'" Hollander said. (It's unclear why achieving real equality would suddenly prevent women from being able to locate the kitchen. Is it like the time JR Smith was unable to find his way out of his garage? The burden of equality is a heavy one.)
Hollander's bid to get women out of nightclubs and back into nightclub kitchens didn't exactly result in the cultural shift he'd hoped it would, so now, two years later, he has launched a different, more gender-neutral war, this time against the MTA's "Unlimited" MetroCard scam. A 7-day unlimited MetroCard, he argued in a lawsuit filed on Monday, is not, in fact, unlimited for a full week: It's unlimited for six days from the time of its first use, "plus a variable number of hours up until midnight on that sixth day."
The 30-day pass works in similarly sinister ways, shortchanging paying customers into only 29 days and several odd hours. Hollander is suing for unspecified damages. The MTA declined to comment on the lawsuit.
Unlimited MetroCards have been in circulation since 1998, so it's unclear what Hollander has been doing for the past 15 years while this egregious wrong went quietly unrighted. Probably eating all the shrimp.