Two girls in 7th grade sustained non-life threatening injuries after getting hit by a deranged delivery truck thief in Marine Park yesterday. The unidentified, under-dressed man was attired in just black underwear and a filthy white shirt; he was not carrying ID when police finally apprehended him after his destructive joyride. The Daily News reports that before stealing the delivery truck, the man was seen in Midwood "munching on leaves straight from tree branches and menacing kids with a garden hose." Which sounds like your average fun Thursday afternoon in your skivvies, but then things turned criminal.

When the man jumped behind the wheel of the padded delivery truck, a worker was still inside, and taken helplessly along for the ride, which led the scantily-clad thief to Marine Park, where he hit two 12-year-old girls on their way back from a field trip. "The teacher tried to stop the truck, but he just went around us and nicked me," one of the girls tells the News. "I did not see it coming." She was treated for an injured ankle, and her classmate's injuries were also minor.

And so the bandit kept on truckin' after hitting the kids, crashing into a number of parked cars, then doing donuts on lawns in the neighborhood. "He was running red lights," said witness Alexis Von. "Every time he turned a corner, he hit a car." Of course; that's how you rack up points! Cops finally collared him in Sheepshead Bay after he crashed into a double-parked car. He's currently under psychiatric observation at Kings County Hospital, the Post reports.