The TSA: When they're not hiding creepy notes in your luggage they're just straight-up stealing stuff. Two former TSA workers at JFK Airport pleaded guilty yesterday to grand larceny after they were caught swiping $40,000 from somebody's luggage. Coumar Persad, 44, of Jackson Heights, Queens, and Davon Webb, 31, of the Bronx will each serve six months in jail for their crime, which was perpetrated in January after Persad X-rayed a piece of baggage headed for an American Airlines flight.

Prosecutors say [pdf] Persad spotted a large amount of U.S. currency inside the bag, and called up Webb, his coworker, who was in the baggage belt area. Persad told Webb to check the bag, and he confirmed there was indeed a fat wad of cash in there. How fat? According to the Queens DA, $170,000! Out of that, Persad and Webb took a modest $40K. But instead of being commended for exercising such restraint, they got ratted out by a coworker.

Persad and Webb met in the bathroom to divide the spoils, with Persad presumably taking more as some sort of finder's fee. (As we know from Morty Seinfeld, a finder's fee is 10 percent "and no more," and that seems to be the exact amount of Persad's bonus.) But after a TSA worker caught wind of the windfall, their supervisor was notified, and the two thieves were soon confronted by Port Authority police. They gave cops permission to search their homes, and officers found $23,980.00 at Persad’s home—he had taken $20 to buy food—and $16,000 at Webb's place.

"Passengers must feel secure when they pass through our airports here in Queens County that they are not being targeted by those who would use their position of authority to steal the possessions of others," said Queens DA Richard Brown. "The defendants have now been held accountable for their greed and the sentence to be imposed is warranted." Both men will be on probation for five years after getting their freak on in jail.