Times Square may typically resemble a nightmare Epcot Center filled with marauding gangs of copyrighted characters, but sometimes it's the humans you need to worry about the most. According to police, a "Weed Man" of Times Square got into a physical altercation with the "Beer Man" of Times Square, who is known for carrying a sign reading "I need beer." And Alien and Predator were called in as witnesses!

According to NY1, this "Weed Man" stabbed Wayne Semancik (aka "Beer Man") during a panhandling turf dispute around 10:15 p.m. at 42nd Street near 7th Avenue. Semancik told them that "Weed Man" (apparently Dwight Laird) spit in his face: "When you spit in my face, darling, I'm going to hit you. I don't care who you are, how big you are, I'm going to hit you," Semancik said. "So the man, he pulled out a pen because I was hitting him, and he started stabbing me in the face, and I have five stab wounds in my face right now."

Laird was arrested, but it's not clear what he's been charged with. But at least one truly good thing came out of this whole brouhaha: Alien and Predator have finally learned to work together! Although, the kid in the bottom right of the photo above seems a bit suspicious about this unholy union.

Note: There's another the notorious "Weed Man" of Times Square.