It's going to be eight squillion degrees this weekend, so even those schmancy new Citi Bike stations in Queens and Greenpoint might not spare you the scourge of weekend subway commuting. Indeed, Saturday would be best spent filling your shower with ice cubes and watching that excellent documentary on the making of Wet Hot American Summer. The outside is cruel, the inside is safe.

Here's what's on tap this weekend:

1 trains will not run in either direction between 14 St and South Ferry, starting at 11:30 p.m. on Friday and ending at 5 a.m. on Monday.

2 trains will not run between E 180 St and 149 St-Grand Concourse from 3:30 a.m. Saturday to 10 p.m. Sunday. 2 trains will also make local stops between Chambers St and 34 St-Penn Station in both directions, starting at 11:30 p.m. Friday and ending at 5 a.m. Monday.

3 trains will make local stops between Chambers St and 34 St-Penn Station in both directions, starting at 6:30 a.m. and ending at midnight on Saturday and Sunday.

Crown Hts-Utica Av bound 4 trains will run express from 14 St-Union Sq to Brooklyn Bridge-City Hall; that change is in effect from 11:45 p.m. Friday to 7:30 a.m. Sunday, and again from 11:45 p.m .Sunday to 5 a.m. Monday. On that same track, trains will run local from 125 St to 14 St-Union Sq from 12:01 a.m. Saturday to 5 a.m. Monday.

5 trains are suspended in both directions from 11:45 p.m. Friday to 5 a.m. Monday.

Brooklyn Bridge-City Hall bound 6 trains will run express from 14 St-Union Sq to Brooklyn Bridge-City Hall from 11:45 p.m. Friday to 5 a.m. Monday. On that same track, trains will run express from Pelham Bay Park to Parkchester, starting at 11:45 p.m. Friday and ending at 5 a.m. Monday.

A trains will reroute along the F line from W 4 St-Wash Sq and Jay St-MetroTech in both directions, starting at 11:45 p.m. Friday and ending at 5 a.m. Monday. Inwood-207 St bound trains will run express from 125 St to 168 St from 11:45 p.m. Friday to 6:30 a.m. Sunday, and again from 11:45 p.m. Sunday to 5 a.m. Monday.

C trains will reroute along the F line between W 4 St-Wash Sq and Jay St-MetroTech in both directions, starting at 6:30 a.m. and ending at 11 p.m. on Saturday and Sunday. 168 St-bound trains will run express from 125 St to 168 St during that timeframe.

Coney Island-Stillwell Av bound D trains will reroute along the N line from 36 St to Coney Island-Stillwell Ave, starting at 3:45 a.m. Saturday and ending at 10 p.m. on Sunday.

E trains will not run in either direction between Jamaica Center-Parsons/Archer and Briarwood, starting at 11:45 p.m. Friday and ending at 5 a.m. Monday. Trains will make local stops between Queens Plaza and Forest Hills-71 Av in both directions from 12:01 Saturday to 5 a.m. Monday.

Jamaica-179 St bound F trains will make express stops from Neptune Av to Smith-9 Sts, starting at 11:45 p.m. Friday and ending at 5 a.m. Monday. Trains will make local stops between 21 St-Queensbridge and Forest Hills-71 Av in both directions, with that change in effect from 12:01 a.m. Saturday to 5 a.m. Monday.

L trains will operate in two sections, from 8 Av to Broadway Junction, and then from Broadway Junction to Rockaway Pkwy every 24 minutes. That change is in effect from 7 a.m. to 7 p.m. on Saturday and Sunday.

Astoria-Ditmars Blvd bound N trains will make stops along the D line between Coney Island-Stillwell Av and 36 St, starting at 11:45 p.m. on Friday and ending at 5 a.m. on Monday. During that period, trains on that track will skip 49 St. On the Coney Island-Stillwell Av bound track, trains will skip 45 St and 53 St, with that change in effect from 12:01 a.m. Saturday to 5 a.m. Monday.

Manhattan-bound Q trains will make express stops from Kings Hwy to Prospect Park, starting at 11:15 p.m. Friday and ending at 5 a.m. Monday. On that same track, trains will skip 49 St from 11:45 p.m. Friday to 6:30 a.m. Sunday, and again from 11:45 p.m. Sunday to 5 a.m. Monday.

36 St-bound R trains will stop at 53 St and 45 St from 11:45 p.m. Friday to 6:30 a.m. Sunday, and again from 11:45 p.m. Sunday to 5 a.m. Monday. Uptown trains will skip 49 St from 6:30 a.m. to 11:30 p.m. on Saturday and Sunday.