Yesterday, John Boehner revealed that the fate of the global economy now rests on the broad-but-somewhat-bland shoulders of the Ben Affleck-helmed movie The Town. And today, police are searching for a thief who stole nearly $15K with a ploy straight out of that movie. Why does the universe want Ben Affleck, and Ben Affleck aficionados, to succeed so badly?

The thief, in his early 30s, dressed up as an armored truck guard and went to Lorenzo's Enterprises on 31st Street in Astoria about 10:15 a.m. Friday. He told them he was there for a pickup and was handed $14,800 in cash, no questions. Employees said they never suspected the man, because he was clad in an official GARDA Armored Courier uniform—they only realized their error when the real courier arrived a few hours later. Police are now trying to determine whether the suspect was a former employee of the company, or perhaps some sort of master of disguise.