Remember when we all thought Rick Perry was going to take off his leathery mask to reveal a grinning, grey Andy Kaufman? Unfortunately he was just incompetent, but a new account of Perry's campaign reveals that his incompetence wasn't his fault! Perry was suffering from sleep apnea, which led to some of his greatest hits, like "53 Seconds/John Cage Tribute," and "Speaking In Foreign Policy Tongues." In related news, George W. Bush's spokesman confirmed that the former president slept like a child from 2000 to 2008.

According to Texas Tribune reporter Jay Root, Perry's back surgery in July of 2011 triggered the condition, which is found in 1 in 10 men, and henceforth the governor "went from light sleeper to insomniac." He was prescribed a CPAP mask, but by the time he began sleeping regularly again it was too late: "He was becoming an afterthought," one campaign official said.

We don't remember much from med school, but Perry looks pretty well-rested in this thing: