I remember there was this one kid in my grade school named Timmy Lipshitz, which is a somewhat hilaaaarious last name if you have the undeveloped mind of a fourth grader. We all know children are cruel, sadistic savages who delight in tormenting the weak and abnormal (I was overweight, and for years I was known as the Stay-Puft Marshmallow Man, or eventually "Stay," which was somehow worse—thank you for remembering me in your prayers), but we expect educators to show a tad more maturity, and not ask poor little Timmy to wipe the excrement off his lips. (Unless there is in fact excrement on his lips.) But apparently that's too much to ask, at least from one teacher in New Jersey.

Yvette Nichols, a tenured teacher at Pines Lake Elementary School, was suspended last year after she got giddy on Facebook over a student whose name shares the same syllable as a common expletive ha ha. NorthJersey.com isn't reporting what expletive the name shares, but apparently it was just too much for Nichols, who wrote on Facebook, "How do you think I feel when I have to address him???? I literally can’t stop laughing! I have to go all year with this---!!!" Come on Yvette, save it for the teachers' lounge.

The school district determined that Nichols was guilty of "bullying, harassment or intimidation," which Nichols denies, but she did admit to poking fun at her student's name on social media. "I want to ask the parents if I can change it" she shared, adding, "I still can’t get over the student’s name!" Now I really want to know this kid's name, because I have the mind of a fourth grader. Was it Peter P. Cockinstuff? Bobby Bullafarht? Dick Hertz? JUDGE REINHOLD?

Nichols resigned last year after 13 years as a teacher.