Employees at Dr. Toothy’s Dental Office in Chinatown were shocked yesterday when UPS delivered a suspicious package that turned out to be a 31-pound brick of marijuana—all the way from Texas! "My reaction is disgust that the drug-enforcement agencies and all the different agencies couldn’t seize this," said Orthodontist Richard Lyons, who was delivered the package sent by "Gwendaline Lyons" of Katy, Texas, of whom there is no listing. Fortunately, Lyons's life experience enabled him to identify the substance right away: "From my 70's days, when I saw the green and smelled it, I knew it was marijuana." All detectives should get that kind of training!

The pot apparently came in a plastic bin and was wrapped in plastic wrap. There were also baby wipes on top to mask any suspicious odor. Lyons called the police, who told him the brick had a street value of at least $45,000. And apparently the smell was overpowering. One cop said, "I got a headache just standing next to it." However, Lyons displayed some braggadocio when talking about possible suspicion: "I am the king of Chinatown, and I am not worried about anybody or any repercussions." We bet those cops didn't realize they were in the presence of royalty! If that's the case, he should have just stashed it. Dr Toothy's Dental Office: The Alternative To Nitrous Oxide!