Meet Prince Jefri Bolkiah (right), the younger brother of the Sultan of Brunei, a formerly oil-rich state on the island of Borneo, in Southeast Asia. Bolkiah used to live like any other prince, with a modest stable of cars, hotels, wives, mistresses, and yachts. But after the Asian economic crash in 1997, his brother accused him of embezzling billions from Brunei. As part of a settlement, the little prince agreed to live on an austere allowance of $300,000 a month. But you try scraping by on that, when you've got a harem to support and statues of yourself having sex to finance!
Prince Jefri is in the news today because he's suing his former lawyers for $7 million in Manhattan court. (Upon hearing the amount Jefri's seeking, Judge Ira Gammerman reportedly gasped, "Seven million? That's chump change for the sultan.") Oh, how the mighty have fallen. The prince alleges that his former attorneys, Faith Zaman and Thomas W. Derbyshire, who are married, allegedly "engaged in misconduct to enrich themselves at the expense of" their client, Prince Jefri. How could lawyers DO SUCH A THING?!
The defendants' attorney has been talking to the press about Bolkiah's statues, of which there are four in number, and Prince Jefri's new lawyers are trying to make sure the jury doesn't find out about them, because they're embarrassing. So if Judge Gammerman rules them inadmissable, at least they'll be 12 people in this town who aren't marveling at the sex trophies, which were featured in the Daily News this morning. A lawyer for Zaman told the judge yesterday, "I'll tell you what: They make me blush. They're very explicit."
According to the News, the statues "depict the muscular prince in a series of sexual positions with the woman," his then-fiance. As a palate cleanser, enjoy this video of the Muppets singing that classic "Borneo Bay" song, and try to imagine being rich enough to afford statues of yourself having sex.