Have you heard? It is snowing! How festive, how fraught with potential to completely derail your day, even though the only Weather Phenomenon currently forecasted for New York City is this very flimsy snow scattering that may possibly be replaced by rain within the hour.

Nonetheless, our battle-scarred Sanitation Department and Office of Emergency Management seem to be sticking to their recent pledge to do better. That eminently manageable six-inch snowstorm that ravaged the tristate area on November 15—which the city's Snow Defense Team spectacularly fumbled despite their ample preparedness—sits fresh in all our minds. We arrogantly assumed that a measly two inches would not send cars and trucks slipping around our traffic-choked streets for hours, especially after officials held a press conference to show us all the salt the city stores as a bulwark against the dreaded Wintry Mix. Wow how wrong we were.

And now the Sanitation Department and OEM will engage their FULL SNOW RESPONSE for two or more inches, and hey, they're reportedly prepared to salt the streets sometimes when it's not really snowing at all. Today, for instance: At 6 a.m., NYC Sanitation issued a "snow alert" for these flurries, declaring that the "salt spreaders are loaded and ready to be deployed around the 5 boroughs."

The OEM seems to have taken things one step further: They're not waiting around for disaster to strike, not this time. "NYC Emergency Management will continue to work closely with NWS to monitor the weather," reads a press release I feel compelled to quote at length. Further, the agencies "will activate the City’s situation room beginning at 6 a.m. Thursday to coordinate any response to potential impacts associated with the wintry mix." Emphasis mine, and warranted, considering that this SNOW ALERT is not the only alert we have on deck today.

"It's also a Gridlock Alert Day, so please leave your cars at home and take mass transit whenever possible," outgoing NYC Emergency Management Commissioner Joseph Esposito said in a statement, heavily emphasizing that the prospect of "slippery conditions" could work like a banana peel under the subway system's unwitting foot, knocking both your commutes on their butts.

Anyway, while parts of Connecticut and New Jersey and even New York stand to accrue between one and two inches, most of the city shouldn't progress past flurries that transition into a frigid rain around noon. However, be advised that "a dusting to an inch of snow accumulation is in the forecast, with a slight chance for locally higher amounts of 1 to 3 inches possible in northern parts of Queens, Manhattan, and The Bronx," per the OEM. And while temps hover in the mid-to-high 30s, possibly even tipping into the 40s, stupid wind chill will make you it feel like freezing 20s. Also, the current cloud cover will persist.

So, to sum up, I'd just like to stress that no one can truly know The Weather, any meteorological prediction can change on a dime, and you should maintain constant vigilance w/r/t these flurries. The Weather is to be feared, never trusted.