The MTA is bringing the pain this weekend, with the first of the dreaded doomsday service cuts. Both the V line and the W line will be sent to a nice farm upstate to happily live out the rest of their days. Tomorrow the very last W train will leave Ditmars at 10:17 p.m. and continue to Brooklyn; the MTA says it'll be "replaced" by the N, Q, and R in Manhattan and Queens, but could any train really replace our darling Dubya? And don't even get us started on the V—not here, not now! At least there'll be a farewell party on that last W run (to "commemorate the short, complicated and often pathetic life of our beloved W.")

The new orange M will replace weekday V service along Sixth Avenue (except at 2nd Avenue in Manhattan; customers bound for the 2nd Avenue station must take the F train.) The new M will travel from Middle Village-Metropolitan Avenue to Forest Hills-71st Avenue in Queens via 6th Avenue, and will no longer operate in lower Manhattan or to Bay Parkway, Brooklyn. On weekends, the M will continue to operate as a shuttle between Middle Village-Metropolitan Avenue and Myrtle Avenue at Broadway in Brooklyn. The N will now run local along Broadway. Please familiarize yourself with the new maps.

And on Monday dozens of bus lines will be eliminated, including the M27, from First to Eighth Avenues; the M30; the B39, which crosses the Williamsburg Bridge; the B23, from 60th Street to Flatbush Avenue; the Q74; and the Bx14, which served the Country Club section of The Bronx. The Post puts a human face on the cuts by interviewing one Elsie Rosado, a mother of two who picks up her children from school in Manhattan by taking the M from Brooklyn. But since the M will no longer serve her part of Brooklyn, she says, "My kids and I will have to do an hour-and-15 commute instead of 45 minutes now." Officials say the cuts will save the agency $93 million of an $800 million budget shortfall.