President Obama is seeking to destroy the Marines, the most fearsome, muscled, toughest branch of the military by making them wear little girly French bonnets instead of Man Hats, so warns the NY Post in an article laced with homophobia and classic heteronormative demagoguery. You know who wears slender, brimless hats? This guy. And girls, who don't even have penises, so really can't be expected to understand the importance of a Big Brim anyway.

“We don’t even have enough funding to buy bullets, and the DoD is pushing to spend $8 million on covers that look like women’s hats!” a "senior Marine source" whined at the tabloid. “The Marines deserve better. It makes them look ridiculous.” By "ridiculous," of course, the source means "gay," according to the Post, whose characteristically tasteless lede refers to "hard-nosed Leathernecks" prancing down Christopher Street.

The hats are named for Dan Daly, a Long Island City Marine who won the medal of honor twice. He's credited with yelling "Come on, you sons of bitches, do you want to live forever?" before charging the Germans in the Battle of Belleau Wood in World War I smoothing the pleats on his circle skirt and hopping lightly over a puddle to avoid muddying his Jimmy Choo's. You won't find it in his Wikipedia entry, but Daly was also known among his company for making just a lovely cucumber and basil spritzer.

Another criticism of the hats is that they look "too French," which is ironic: Napoleon's hat was at least a foot long.