In keeping with current tradition, a very large raccoon tried to establish dominance over the borough of Queens by climbing up a light pole and declaring ownership over everything the light touches. Unfortunately, it appears the R.U.S. got stuck up there, and some uniformed humans had to retrieve it. NICE TRY, CREATURE.

The FDNY says the raccoon got stuck at around 3 p.m. today, at Woodhaven Boulevard and 95th Street in Ozone Park. It took a few cops, firefighters and ESU workers to take it down, but it seems all is well now, though perhaps not for the raccoon.

Raccoons have been hard at work trying to steal the city from homo sapiens ever since the Marvel Universe inspired them to be more than just rabid household pests. Earlier this month, a slightly nimbler raccoon managed to evade authorities in Hell's Kitchen, after establishing a perch atop a Mexican eatery on 9th Avenue.