A Queens mail carrier allegedly threw away 2,000 pieces of mail, according to the Queens district attorney's office. At this point it's surprising anyone gets any mail delivered at all, let alone all those The New Yorker issues my roommate never subscribed to.

The mail carrier in question, Norberto Cintron, was assigned to a district in Queens Village. He joins far too many fellow workers accused of hiding or failing to deliver mail 'round these parts. Though to be fair, historical documents suggest nobody from the post office has ever cracked the 50 percent barrier.

Postal Workers of America, take note: there are much better ways to misuse your mail truck.