While much of western Brooklyn is scraping and clawing at each other to get a chance at a two-hour window inside the newly reopened McCarren Park Pool, there are a few lucky Brooklyn residents who have been graced with private swimming pools in their buildings. But even those are not the utopias one might imagine: unhappiness over pool rules have led some members of a rent stabilized Kensington building to rebel against their chlorine overlords. One disgruntled tenant posted the sign above on the elevator this week—we imagine that meeting went a little bit like this:

Tenant Lornagrl explains that most similar luxury buildings built in the 1960s were converted to co-ops. But the tyranny of the pool rules has alienated residents—they're not allowed to bring guests, they have to pay a $50 upkeep fee, and most damningly, the pool has weird hours and isn't open on Saturdays. She explains the sticking point with the fee:

Ironically the fee for the pool is actually illegal. The pool is an amenity of the building, and it's against the law for theme to charge us for it. Just like the doorman and the laundry room, these amenities are covered in the rent. Furthermore the owners of the building would love to close the pool, but they can't because if they closed the pool, it would be a reduction of service and therefore, the tenants would be entitled to a rent reduction.

So she estimates every lap around the pool costs her $6.25 per swim. Which, you know, is still better than risking seeing someone defecate in public or getting your underwear manhandled by police. But then again, who wants to see any more "summer dreams of eating cold borscht by pool with lady who do not own badge" crumble?