In what is sure to be a strong contender for Best Rib-Tickler In A Law Enforcement Press Release at this year's Flackys (reservations held at the Ft. Myers Ramada for a limited time only), U.S. Customs announced this morning, "An arriving passenger at John F. Kennedy International Airport had a different kind of 'beef' when encountered by U.S. Customs and Border Protection Officers."

On March 20, Yudishtir Maharaj flew into JFK from Port of Spain, Trinidad, with three packages of frozen meat. "When probed, the frozen packages of meat produced a white powder that tested positive for cocaine." All told, Maharaj allegedly packed about 7.35 pounds of blow in his meat. According to the Trinidad Express, the street value of the cocaine is between $1.2 and $1.8 million. The cooked goat meat is now worthless.

Maharaj claims he wasn't aware that there were 7.35 pounds of cocaine inserted into the three, freezing cold hunks of cooked goat meat he was carrying in his suitcase. Nevertheless, he now faces charges from the U.S. Attorney's office in the Eastern District Court of New York.

Four days later, another Trinidadian, Alister King, was stopped at JFK after he "appeared nervous." A search revealed "a bulky item…discovered in the defendant's groin area," which was later determined to be 2.2 pounds of cocaine, with a street value of around a half a million dollars. He told authorities that he was promised 30% of the proceeds for smuggling the drugs.