Comedian Jackie Mason, 75, had to call the cops on 48-year-old paramour Kaoru Suzuki-McMullen when they ended up in a physical altercation over a domestic dispute Friday morning. At least we got an answer to that age old joke: how many hoarders does it take to beat up an aging Jewish comedian?

The dispute began when Suzuki-McMullen awoke Friday morning to find Mason sleeping on the couch in the living room inside his W. 56th St. apartment—“She woke him up and accused him of cheating,” a source told the Post. Mason denied the accusation—but presumably admitted that the couch cushions were "coming on" to him.

Mason asked her to leave, and when she refused, they allegedly ended up in a physical brawl; as Mason tried to call his doorman to remove her, she grabbed at him, with Mason suffering "bloody scratches and bruises" on his left wrist.

Suzuki-McMullen was arrested on an assault charge—but her neighbors told the Daily News they were just shocked she was dating Mason to begin with: “That she dates Jackie Mason blows my mind,” said neighbor Ben Cathers. “It’s really wild that the crazy lady in our building is dating a world-famous comic.” He described her as a hoarder: “She yells a lot and leaves her garbage in the hall." Another neighbor gave a similar account: “She’s definitely a little wacky,” said Behrush Sharifi. But we guess you'd have to be a little wacky to put up with a Jewish "husband:"