"Today it appears that an agreement to prevent this New Year's tax hike is in sight but it's not done. Not yet," President Obama said this afternoon, before jinxing the entire fiscal cliff negotiations less than 12 hours before they expire. "The agreement would ask the wealthiest 2% to pay higher taxes for the first time in two decades. That's progress," the president said, referring to a compromise obstinate Republicans probably didn't want to hear out loud, at least until tomorrow. "But we're gonna need to do more."

That "more" was described by the president as a "balanced" approached to a second-part deal to manage the massive, mindless spending cuts set to kick in during the coming months (this short-term fiscal cliff deal would only deal with taxes and keeping unemployment insurance flowing—oh, and your taxes are probably going to go up regardless).

The president, it seemed, was standing his ground on a deal that hadn't been made yet before this more urgent deal had even been finalized.

If Republicans think that I will use spending cuts alone, that we're just gonna shove spending cuts down…[Pause, laughter in audience] "Shove spending cuts at us that hurt students, seniors, middle class families, without asking the equivalent sacrifices from millionaires and companies that have a lot of lobbyists, well they have another thing coming.

Hey, Mr. President, you probably should have refined that Deep Throat GOP gag your speechwriters laughed at a bit more before testing it on national TV 12 hours prior to the Capitol dome exploding in clammy jowls and bruised egos.

But maybe politicians and the poor souls charged with observing them aren't so easily scared?

Yep, we're fucked.