Fine, lady with the banana peel, we forgive you. Lady moving her distressed table? You're okay, too. Because those transgressions of subway etiquette are totally awesome next to this horrible demonstration of mankind: The jerk in an Eagles hat who masturbates TO COMPLETION on the train. City Councilman Peter Vallone—your Subway Pervert Wall of Shame is sounding better and better!

Eddie Going sent us this photograph, taken by Robert S.—who also photographer the horrible next moment (extremely graphic and disturbing NSFW photo here). The subject did not seem homeless—he apparently just needed a release right then and there... and then he wiped it on himself.

Finally, we dedicate this photograph to every one who has ever been skeptical of subway pervert reports—you are very lucky to have never witnessed or been victimized by a subway pervert in action. And if you do witness or experience groping, grinding or indecent exposure, report it to a police officer or MTA worker... even if NY State's highest court doesn't think grinding or ejaculating on a victim is a felony.