With the U.S. Postal Service asking Congress to authorize a five-day work week for postal employes, down from the current six-day week, because of falling revenues, the NY Post turned to a well-known figure. However, that figure is known for only playing a postal worker, not actually being one. Yes, the Post has a column from Wayne Knight, aka the actor who played Newman on Seinfeld.

Knight admits, "This, of course, makes eminent sense, because as Newman, I was known as one of America's premier ersatz mail carriers. (I guess John Ratzenberger was unavailable.)" before launching into some background: "Well, first I think it's important to understand that Newman never delivered the mail on six consecutive days in his life. The cost in footwear alone would have been enormous. He would be firmly against the five-day week, which would be an increase in his schedule that would seem draconian." Knight believes his alter ego would have proposed a "Roll Your Own Day Off," where postal workers can choose a day to take off to keep mail recipients on their toes, "The mail carriers of this country are fine, upstanding people who work hard for a bureaucracy that rivals Stalinist Russia. They would love to be able to shop on a day when the stores are open."

And with that, we leave you with this clip from The Andrea Doria episode of Seinfeld, where Jerry delivers mail for Newman because Kramer (taking dog medication) bit him on the ankle:

We await a column from Michael Douglas about Wall Street.