Talks between the NBA Players Association and the NBA broke down again today, this time likely for good, as the players rejected the owners' proposed collective bargaining agreement that included at 50-50 split of basketball-related income. The executive director of the Players Association tells ESPN that the owners were "not willing and prepared to negotiate." Barring any surprises, this leaves only professional football, college football, soccer, NASCAR, hockey, and college basketball for sports fans to center their personal lives around.

The players are now eyeing the possibility of disbanding the union to form a trade association, which would presumably give them more leverage. NBA Commissioner David Stern told the AP, "This is it. We've been negotiating this for 2 1/2 years. The owners authorized a revised proposal, and they said if it's not acceptable and they want to keep negotiating, we present them with a 47 percent, flex cap proposal. They know it."

When will they just admit that they're all selfish simulacrums of human beings? Do it for Spike Lee; he's starting to get chilly in those rinkside seats.