Whether they're translating Rubaiyat of Omar Khayyam or applying glue with tweezers on the doors of their model DeLorean, residents of Park Avenue need silence. But the throbbing noise of the Gansevoort Park Avenue hotel's pool parties are making their Sundays miserable. "The bass will start, and the windows will vibrate," neighbor Mary Ellen Maher says, describing what scientists have termed "The Douche Rattle," when an inordinate amount of tribal tattoos collide with Benny Benassi.

The Post notes that "about 300" people chose to spend their Sunday from 3:30 to 8:30 p.m. waiting in line to pay for $15 cocktails at a "pool party" where no one actually gets into the pool—more than the 254 people allowed on the entire roof and way more than the 54-person capacity set for the outdoor area by the DOB.

“We try our best to respect our neighbors. We know that there are people who are at home trying to enjoy their Sunday,’" the food-service manager for the hotel's rooftop says. "Some of the neighbors understand that we are trying to run a business." Indeed, it's hard to make 28-year-old real estate agents hemorrhage money without music loud enough to obstruct sentience, and who else will serve people wearing AXE Spiking Glue?

CB 5's District Manager Wally Rubin told the paper that the board met with neighbors, police, and hotel reps and that they "will continue to work towards an amicable solution," presumably one that will involve body shots.