Seriously: a Brooklyn man claims that some of New York's finest strangled his penis using the drawstrings from his pants during an arrest in Crown Heights in June 2011. Nathaniel Carter says he was falsely arrested for consuming alcohol on a public street, then taken back to police headquarters where he was beaten and kicked. And oh yeah, officers also “strangled the plaintiff about the neck, placed a drawstring around his penis, and strangled his penis, causing bodily injury." Read the full suit below.

Strangled

After being released, Carter said he called 911 and was taken to Kings County Hospital Center where he was treated for a laceration on his penis. The incident happened on June 12, 2011 near 1488 Sterling Place. Carter maintains that he wasn't drunk at the time, and that he was maliciously prosecuted, because "there was not a scintilla of credible evidence to support the charges for which the plaintiff was charged."

Carter is seeking unspecified monetary damages. So it's time to ask yourselves: how much do you think a strangled, damaged penis is worth?