First the bad news: The Kentile Floors sign, a gigantic fossil that arose from Brooklyn's pre-artisanal primordial soup, is indeed being ousted from its pedestal in Gowanus, and soon millions of F and G train commuters will have nothing to look forward to in their lives. But before you throw yourself onto the Smith-9th Street tracks in utter despair, take heart: The sign will be preserved and rebuilt somewhere else.
Councilmember Brad Lander has used his vast and infinite power to help negotiate an arrangement with the owner of the insignificant building that supports the all-important sign. The owner, Eli Cohen, has agreed to donate the sign to the Gowanus Alliance, which has pledged to find a new home for the obsolete advertisement for asbestos-ridden flooring.
Of course, there are logistical challenges in removing the sign in a way that it can be reassembled—the Department of Buildings permit allows for the sign to be broken into small pieces and tossed down a chute, which isn't exactly conducive to preservation. "Maybe we’ll have to talk to the Buildings Department and see if it is permissible to lower them by pulley and be preserved," Councilmember Lander told the Times. Oooh, a system of pulleys? Say what you want about Lander, the guy knows his constituents.
Where the sign winds up remains to be seen, but we're pulling for Quooklyn.
