On Wednesday, a pair of adorable kittens frolicking on the train tracks brought subway service to standstill in Brooklyn for several hours as workers tried to rescue them. August and Arthur were thankfully rescued, and are now being taken care of at Animal Care and Control Center. But if Joe Lhota was mayor, we maybe wouldn't have had such a positive outcome. Lhota's campaign spokesman the Post that if he were mayor, he would not have stopped the trains: “It’s not the decision of the mayor, it's up to the MTA, but he would not shut down the line.” And this has inspired rival John Catsimatidis to go on the offensive with the single greatest cat-related political campaign in history.

Catsimatidis was apparently deeply moved by the adventures of the subway kittens, writing this poetic email to Daily Intel:

I am an Animal Lover Especially CATS Supposed they were Baby Rats Its up to the Policeman on the Scene to make decision Not the Mayor

And then he started tweeting about it:

And, uh, he kept going:

Apparently, this incident hit Catsimatidis especially hard because he misses his own fluffball:

For what it's worth, there were trains running at different points Wednesday while the cats were still under the third rail, and they weren't killed—but when you get lobbed a softball about animals, you always go the safe route. Lhota is likely still hurting since he had to put his 15-year-old dog down earlier this week.

As for the other candidates, they all were smart enough to align themselves with pro-kitten stances: Republican candidate George McDonald told Daily Intel this was a good solution for the rat problem, a spokesman for Bill Thompson said he would "work to protect" subway kittens in such a situation, and a spokesperson for Christine Quinn said "Chris would have stopped the trains for the kitties."

As for Anthony Weiner, whose campaign has hit rock bottom in recent weeks, he'll apparently do anything to win any supporters at this point: “If Anthony is elected mayor, he will not only stop trains for kittens, he will personally crawl over the third rail to do it,” spokeswoman Barbara Morgan told the Post.

The kittens, who are around eight-weeks-old, are undergoing physical and behavioral tests, and will receive shots this weekend. They will be transferred to a foster home over the next couple of days, then put up for adoption: “They’ll be available for adoption in a couple of weeks, after some much-needed TLC,” said AC&C spokesman Richard P. Gentles.