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It Is March And It Is Still Snowing And It Will Never Stop Snowing

After howling winds made their triumphant return Tuesday like the emissaries of misery that they are, something even stranger happened this morning: it snowed. Or at least we think it snowed. It snowed as if we were dancing upon the ashes of a burnt down paper company, as if we had been living in the shadow of an oatmeal factory after a nuclear apocalypse, as if God is in serious need of Head and Shoulders.

Mothereffing snow #nyc #snow #whygod #uws

A video posted by Jen Chung (@chungjen) on

Were we dreaming? Are we dreaming right now? What is the nature of reality? Do weather bloggers dream of snow year round?

It was confusing. Wasn't it warm out like, yesterday? But yesterday was Monday. Today is Wednesday. Friday is the first day of spring. It is going to snow on the first day of spring. It is going to snow one to three inches of snow during the day on Friday, the first day of spring. It was warm on Monday. Monday was two days ago. As of Friday, Monday will be four days ago. Five days from now it will be Monday again. In between it will snow. It will also be bitterly cold.

It is going to snow on Friday.

Friday is the first day of spring.

Today is Wednesday.

It snowed this morning.

It will snow again.

Tomorrow is Thursday.

Fuck spring.

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