The NYPD seems to hand out as many citations for public urination as there are bros passed outside 13th Step on a Saturday night. But which neighborhoods are you more likely to pop a squat with impunity, and where should you gird your bladder to avoid a fine (or a misdemeanor charge)? Thanks to the good people at the NYPD's Records Access Division, we've put together this interactive map of how many public urination citations were handed out by each precinct in 2012:

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Williamsburg's precinct leads those in Manhattan and Brooklyn, with 1,181 citations handed out in the 90th Precinct last year. But exercise caution in Elmhurst, Queens, whose 115th and 110th Precincts pulled in 2,252 and 1,602 public urination citations respectively. Both of those precincts were profiled by the Times in October as the "Corridor of Vice" in Queens, overflowing with bars, their drunk patrons, and eager Johns.

Lower Manhattan received a relatively low number of citations — 573 in the Lower East Side, and 704 in the West Village — which (as anyone whose been in Lower Manhattan on a Saturday night can attest) is less a sign of a dearth of drinking in those neighborhoods than an abundance of restrooms, or apathetic officers.

While you may, in your next morning's hungover daze, only remember being cited for "public urination," the NYPD actually hands out two different citations: One civil infraction for violating NYC Administrative Code 116-18(6), like a littering charge; and another for violation Health Code 153.09, “disposing of noxious chemicals." This is the misdemeanor charge that could potentially haunt your life—like the lingering odor of asparagus accenting the air of sweet release.

While the charges appear to be handed out indiscriminately, our theory on their application hinges how much Jäger is in the offender's bloodstream. This map combines both citations, along with a third, rarely-given citation for urinating in a City park. To see where people complain about public urination, check out this other map we made.