Sydney Leathers's former online paramour Carlos Danger reared his inescapable head last night on Fox blowhard Sean Hannity's program. It's been a week or two since Anthony Weiner gave us a good collective cringe, so get ready to once again grind your palm to your forehead in dismay over his continued public existence. Weiner is an immutable fact of our lives, and as he said during the mayoral campaign, we're stuck with him:
The interview got off to an icy start when Hannity asked Weiner what was going through his head with all the sexting and the crotch-shots and the Leathers. But Weiner is just so tired of all that Danger, and refused to answer. "I'm kinda done talking about it," he said. SO ARE WE! And yet here we are. We just can't resist watching Weiner wearily flop around like a catfish on the deck of a rowboat.
Weiner also denied appearing on Hannity's show "as part of a divine plan" to get his own TV show, to become, as Hannity put it, the next Chris Matthews. Then there's a lot of talking over each other and blah blah blah and Weiner assures Hannity, "I'll find something, don't worry about it."
After some more jabbering about raising the debt limit, Weiner flips it on Hannity and starts asking HIM what HIS position is. Hannity is happy to oblige, but even he has his limits, and he finally tells Weiner, "I’m the host, you’re the guest!” Weiner fires back, "I get to do questions! What am I? A potted plant?"
"You never shut up like Chris Matthews, either," Hannity yells. "You want a job at MSNBC! Now I know why you came here today!"
"I want a job on Fox," Weiner replies. "Fox apparently has much lower standards. I'd rather have a job on Fox." Hannity coos, "Oh, ouch. Ooh. You want me to talk about low standards? You really wanna go there?" Weiner tells Hannity he'll go wherever he wants. Maybe they can go on the road together for a reality show where they share a hotel room at every Standard hotel in America? Just spitballing.
Then, in a deliciously weird coda, Weiner asks why Hannity keeps looking off into the distance. Weiner wants to know who's out there, in the darkness. "It's the great mystery," he remarks. Not really. Hannity explains that he's looking at a camera. Because it is a television show. Weiner, as if taking mental notes on how the pros do it, concludes, "Oh, I see, it's a theatrical thing."