Or, at least, the Daily News thinks he will. Yes, that's right, our fine local tabloid is enlisting the help of Grandpa, a 40-year old Black-handed spider monkey who lives in the Staten Island Zoo, to predict the winner of the upcoming New Hampshire GOP primary.

Grandpa, you see, "views life through Yoda-like eyes," and has a psychic knack for predicting the future—he's previously had success in guessing the winners of sporting matches, so now the News is asking him to place his political bets. On a banana.

On Monday, the day before the primary, zookeepers will give Grandpa a bunch of bananas with the names of the GOP candidates written on them. “He could sit there and not do anything for five minutes,” said keeper Peter Laline. “You can never tell with animals,” he said. “They never do exactly what you think they’re going to do.”

Hey, if Paul the octopus could predict the World Cup, why can't a monkey call some political shots? He can't be worse than Michele Bachmann.