What sort of a employer has to forcibly scrape its interns out of the office by midnight, and demand they not return until 7 a.m. the next day? What sort of Melvillian nightmare is this? This is Goldman Sachs. Welcome. Make yourself at home. But not like, too at home. You have to leave.

Basically, Goldman Sachs can't overwork its money-hungry interns, lest they perish and then there's no one left to "move money," or whatever it is that bankers do. From Reuters:

Goldman and other banks have taken steps over the last several years to encourage junior employees, known as analysts and associates, to take time off in a profession notorious for all-nighters and 100-hour work weeks.

The moves came after the death of a Bank of America Corp intern in London in 2013 fueled concerns over working excessive hours. It was later revealed the intern died of natural causes.

Is the ban on 22-hour work days for junior staff borne of actual concern for employee health? Or is this simply an attempt to preempt any more unflattering deaths that might further embarrass the banking industry? And moreover, what is a Goldman Sachs intern supposed to do with all that free time? (Hint: Blade.)

The company hired only three percent of more than 267,000 job applicants last year, Chief Executive Officer Lloyd Blankfein said in February. So yeah, no pressure.