Goldman Sachs made $1.93 billion in the second quarter of 2013 [PDF], doubling its profits from a year ago. “The firm’s performance was solid especially in the context of mixed economic sentiment during the quarter,” CEO Lloyd Blankfein said in a statement. "Solid" is about right—it's not like they made $3.44 billion in a quarter (2009) or $4.9 billion (2010) or heck, even $2.26 billion (2013). Keep striving, guys, you'll make enough money some day—just not today.

So far in 2013, Goldman has allocated a smidge over $8 billion to pay their 31,700 employees, which works out to $252,366 apiece, but that's just an average. Blankfein made $21 million in total compensation last year [PDF].

All of this wealth generation is justified because the bank engages in the equivalent of putting a dollar bill in both the jars labeled "True Love" and "Sex" on the coffee shop counter, by donating 3.9% of their profits to charity last year. It's called corporate responsibility, you should try it some time.