Former and current NYU instructors are a strange lot: sometimes they are into suing James Franco, or (allegedly!) taking upskirt photos of women. Sometimes they fat-shame PhD candidates, or yell at dogs indiscriminately. The latest NYU alum in the news is Heleen Mees, who has been arrested for stalking and harassing former lover and Citigroup chief economist Willem Buiter. “What can I do to make it right? Shall I lick your b---s?” Mees allegedly wrote in one email. If only licking b----s could make everything in a relationship right.

Mees, 44, had been involved in an “intimate relationship” with Buiter, 63, a few years ago; Mees, a one-time adjunct at NYU, had dedicated her doctoral thesis to him. After the relationship went bad, Mees allegedly sent him a barrage of emails containing sexual come-ons, photos of herself masturbating and images of other naked women. She asked “Shall we adopt a child?” and also wrote “Hope your plane falls out of the sky” (though hopefully not in the same message).

Mees also allegedly targeted Buiter’s economist wife, Anne, and children, sending them messages as well. “She was constantly e-mailing him, calling him and texting him,” a law-enforcement source told the Post. “She wanted him...The guy got fed up and was like, ‘That’s it! This chick has to go away.’ ”