It hasn't been open very long, but neighbors residing uncomfortably close to the new $100 million Cooper Square Hotel on the Bowery are already fed up with the noise reverberating from the hotel's various outdoor areas—which was only to be expected considering how many have bedroom windows facing the place. (Some just inches away from the outdoor bar!) To chronicle the escalating complaining, Vanishing New York has started a feature called "Notes from the Backside," and the first winning entry concerns one neighbor's pitched battle with the patio lounge: "About 2 a.m.a drunk woman came out to the patio and wondered at its beauty. I pulled out the megaphone and said in a store announcer kind of voice 'Attention Cooper Square Hotel douchebags: shut the hell up and get off the patio.' Didn't work. She said 'That makes my new york experience complete' and continued to yammer away. The hotel made a half-hearted effort to get her out of there." With warm weather finally here, we give it a week before neighbors go full Delicatessen on the noisemakers and unleash the bodily fluids.