Extra, Extra: The NY Times Is Caught In A Hipster Trap

by Ben Yakas

Published September 15, 2013

Modified September 16, 2013

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Watch Leonard Cohen debut a new song in Dublin, "I've Got A Secret."
A 27-year-old woman was killed by a hit-and-run driver in the Bronx.
Eli Manning has a pot strain named after him in Denver.
Rumor has it that Tom Hardy is the frontrunner to be the next 007 after Daniel Craig.
A 98-year-old woman gives some frank relationship advice: "First of all, you have to be sexually compatible. That’s very important. If anyone tells you different, they’re nuts."
Stephen Crohn, who carried a genetic defect in his white blood cells that made him resistant to AIDS, has died at the age of 66.
With Ray Kelly likely out, will Bill Bratton be the next NYPD commissioner?
A judge in Spain has ordered a feuding couple to partition their apartment right down the middle, in an attempt to stop the couple from incessantly fighting.
Good news everybody: beavers' anal secretions smell similar to vanilla and can be used in baked goods and sweets.
If it's the weekend, that means it's time for someone to write a story in the NY Times about HIPSTERS because HIPSTERS HIPSTERS HIPSTERS.
And finally, even jaguars want to be cuddled: