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- House Speaker Nancy Pelosi said the chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff told her there are safeguards in place for preventing President Donald Trump from launching a nuclear strike during his final moments in office.
- The pandemic has led to a drop in sperm bank supply — frat boys aren't near their campus-adjacent clinics right now — so people who want donated sperm are turning to Facebook groups and apps where they can meet with donors directly.
- The pandemic also caused a skateboard supply shortage, so think twice before rage-snapping your deck like a damn poser.
- Michael Apted, director of the groundbreaking Up series, has died at 79.
- Michael Burry, a.k.a. the real life Christian Bale from The Big Short, thinks Tesla's booming stock is going to crash like the housing market in '07.
- Nicki Minaj is paying Tracy Chapman $450,000 to settle copyright infringement claims after Minaj's song "Sorry" essentially ripped off Chapman's "Baby Can I Hold You."
- AXE bodyspray was quick to condemn the pro-Trump riot after a can of Phoenix was spotted in the wreckage at the Capitol.
- The creator of Law & Order: SVU said the show plans to hire as many out-of-work Broadway actors as it can this year.
- Hope they hire this guy:
doomscrolling break:
— will parry, bearer of the knife (@faayza) January 7, 2021
this person trying to do an audition tape while their cat just wants attention pic.twitter.com/SC282aotCk
