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- Dave Chappelle is pissed at the Observer for saying he "defended" Trump during a show at the Cutting Room.
- Eric Trump is maybetrying to illegally trade some of his guns on the internet.
- The South Carolina man who kidnapped his employee and left her in a shipping container has confessed to seven murders.
- Ivanka Trump is worried that being associated with her dad's campaign will tank her bland clothing empire and other stories from the waning days of the Trump campaign.
- Yoenis Cespedes-related panic enters the "pay the man whatever he wants" phase.
- The latest class of FDNY recruits has more women than any other to date.
- Hillary Clinton won Nickelodeon's Kids Pick the President poll, so why even vote on Tuesday?
- Even if he loses, Donald Trump has revealed the limits of where the American dream can lead.
- And finally, this baby seal just wants to go home:

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