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- Charles Osgood is retiring from CBS Sunday Morning after 22 years as host.
- Huh, why do patriarchal societies keep trying to regulate or legislate what women wear to the beach?
- Jill Stein is thirsty for the RIP Harambe vote.
- Beyonce, Drake and more are reportedly appearing (and performing?) at the VMAs tonight.
- A Manhattan couple wants to pay $199.15 a month for their Orchard Street apartment, the price it was in 1999 the last time the landlord registered tenants for the rent-stabilized space.
- The Associated Press executive editor admits that a tweet the AP sent out about the Clinton Foundation was "sloppy," but apparently not sloppy enough to warrant deleting or retracting it.
- Can Mountain Dew lower your sperm count? The scientists over at Vice investigate.
- Bruce Springsteen paused his four hour long show at MetLife Stadium this week for a marriage proposal.
- Find out what Thor was up to during Captain America: Civil War.
- Three East Village roommates were busted for drugs and guns.
- Two pilots were arrested for suspected intoxication before a flight from Glasgow, Scotland, to Newark, New Jersey.
- And finally, this 100-year-old tortoise ran away from home after falling in love with a tortoise-resembling pipe:
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